Scrum only works if you have a scrum master who can call BS. A leader who understands the product, technology, and people well enough to know when an estimate isn’t realistic, when someone is clearly not at full capacity, or when the product is nowhere near what’s being claimed. For me, that comes from hands-on experience, but that’s not the only path.
The key isn’t just process. It’s discernment. Knowing when to speak up, when to listen, and when to quietly make the right move.
Beautiful Boards Don’t Mean Results
The problem is I’ve worked with too many managers who know scrum. Their JIRA boards are perfect. Everything is labeled, filtered, sorted, and pushed to a dashboard. All their effort goes into the board. The board would look beautiful framed on anyone’s desk. Then you get on a call and the first thing they do is share their screen and walk through graphs showing where things are. A warning sign is they can’t go in depth on any single item. And usually, I’m the one saying that’s not accurate. It’s hard to argue with a pretty dashboard. I know.
In those moments, perseverance means staying focused on reality, not performance theater. Holding the line on what’s true, not what looks good.
Tickets Are Not a Strategy
I once worked for a former VOIP phone manager who was friends with a current executive and landed a job as a development manager. The response to everything was “Do we have a ticket?” It was a terrible experience, and I didn’t have the skills at the time to see this manager as a person who was trying their best. I ended up leaving.
Years later I worked for another manager who came from a large corporation and knew bureaucracy but not much else. Everything required five meetings and pages of theoretical documentation. I did a little better in that situation and transferred internally.
In both cases I don’t think the people were malicious. In hindsight I believe they were trying to make a difference in the only way they knew how. They were unqualified for the role, but their hiring manager was not looking for qualified. They were looking for someone they trusted. A side note—when a manager hires someone unqualified from their network, it’s a red flag. In some cases, that manager may not want someone great pointing out all the deficiencies. You’re unlikely to change that mindset from the bottom up.
Learning from those moments, unknowingly building the emotional strength to navigate the next one better. I didn’t realize it at the time, but those experiences shaped how I show up now.
Not Every Fight Is Worth It
I’ll stop here and say there are environments that cannot be changed and you’re likely to stress yourself out trying to change them. That’s something everyone has to decide for themselves. If you’re concerned about income then ask yourself - is the company still making money despite its shortcomings? Is everyone around you happy working there? What’s the mindset of the people? Are they content with a nine to five while you want an aggressive growth mindset?
Look at the company culture. Cultural values are shaped by the traits the company wants people to value. If those traits are aligned around stability and you’re craving drive and momentum, it might not be a good fit.
If you’re a motivated individual, is it a place you can have passion for over the long term. Remember passion without purpose becomes burnout. Don’t confuse the struggle for progress. Make sure you’re aiming at something meaningful to you.
Influence Without Blowing It Up
Assuming the company is a good fit, there are a few options you have. First, recognize your manager is playing on the same field you are. Build trust over time. Don’t schedule a meeting and tell them everything they’re doing wrong. Why would someone take advice from a person they wouldn’t take criticism from?
Play the game by their rules and show you're a team player. Fill in the gaps by communicating what management needs to know before or after meetings, not by dropping a bomb in the middle that throws the team off balance. Focus on solutions that fit within your company and avoid just listing problems. Your manager represents your team. If they fail, your team’s reputation often goes with it. If you’re looking to transfer teams, it’s much easier to do with your manager’s support.
You don’t need a title to lead, and you don’t need a fight to influence. Trust is built slowly, one thoughtful action at a time.
Speak the Language of the System
Communicate the deficiencies in a way your manager understands. If they’re big on KANBAN boards, pick the top five blockers, bugs, or issues and show them what you’re updating and why. Ensure these are items you can solve within the scope of the project. Don’t make the project feel impossible. The goal is to get a win to show your leadership that you know what you’re doing and your guidance will not cost the company time or profits. If you update the board with fifty new items overnight, it won’t be well received.
Don’t try to fix everything at once. Choose the work that matters and do it consistently. Influence comes from solving real problems, not overwhelming the system.
Spread the Leadership
After you’ve conveyed the issues, loop in the rest of the team. Becoming the “go to” person for your manager might feel good at first, but it can chip away at trust with your team and push you outside their circle. If others aren’t speaking up, talk to them. Find out where they can contribute—ideally in areas they’re passionate about or have strong knowledge in.
Spread the workload and the ownership. If you’re an IC, this shows leadership and builds continuity. If you’re a people manager, this is how you build people to eventually replace you so you can move up.
Real leadership is helping others grow. Don’t make the process about you or how much you’ve endured. It’s about what you help others build in themselves.
Run the Retrospective That Matters
Get your win and schedule a retrospective—if it’s not already part of your team culture. Call out what was done differently. Don’t attribute changes to how your last company operated or a book you read. Let people come to conclusions on their own. They’re much more ingrained that way. Ask: What went well? What didn’t? What helped people? What made things harder? What should become standard, and what should be iterated on or thrown out completely?
Depending on your team, you might get long silences. Don’t rush to fill the uncomfortable silences. Let people think. Usually once one person speaks up, the conversation starts to flow. Glean what people like and what they don’t. Take what people like and implement it at every opportunity. Don’t force the parts that people are not a fan of. Learn why they have negative feelings towards these items and iterate them.
Listen when it would be easier to lead. Let people speak. Let them reflect. That’s how ownership takes root.
Rollout Without Whiplash
When people outside your team encounter a change, schedule time with them to discuss the changes. Don’t ever send a wiki page with these changes saying here’s what we’re doing now. Their first thought will be WTF our procedure has been working well for years. They’re probably not going to read a long wiki page. A TLDR section at the top can help, but it’s not going to convey the full impact of why you want the change made and the impact it is already having.
Even good ideas fail when forced too quickly. Take time to explain the “why” and give people space to understand the change.
Real Change Takes Time
This process is not a quick fix. It will not be smooth, and you will still get frustrated. On a personal note, do your best not to take those emotions home with you. It is about work life harmony, not work life balance, because if you are in this situation, you are already out of balance. Find the good and focus on it. Look for small wins. Pay attention to the people who are trying, not just the process that is not. Reframe your day by asking what you learned, what helped someone else, or what you are proud of. Zoom out now and then to see how far you have come. Anchor to what motivates you. Know that you are probably trying to do more than the company expects. Recognize the gap between their expectations and yours. Move at the pace the company is used to and do not burn yourself out. You are showing good intentions, not trying to stage a takeover. There are ways to improve your situation, but none of them are magic.
It takes experience to know you don’t have to be the loudest person in the room to be the most effective. Show up. Stay patient. Play the long game. Build trust. Take care of yourself. And keep moving forward.
